Final comment, Group Vampire
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Hello, I was mighty impressed by the narrative solution you employed. I have a soft spot for story-driven elements and your running slides hit that spot perfectly. You are structured and organised in your approach in the text, and it is easy to get a clear overview of your successes and failures. You make your points relevant by not only mentioning which aspects were relative successes, but because you go into detail as to why you think that is. You mention early in the introduction that you extracted certain insights from the development of your game. In the actual text I sometimes find this part to be lacking direct address. My point is that you touch upon details that didn’t go as planned, but it feels as though you could elaborate more directly upon what that actually meant for you in terms of learning. What was the lesson learned from the tutorial situation? To take more time to implement features? Planning priority? I see perfectly the situation you describe, but it would aid the reader if you tied back more clearly to what you stated in the introduction about valuable learning outcomes. Perhaps this could be done by directly addressing what this problem taught you that would be valuable when moving further into the education. In short, I believe it would be appropriate if you went from a specific problem you faced in the making of the game to a more general statement of what that problem taught you about design. Cheers,  |